Guilt-free non-action

7/2

I thought I was actually good at this, but apparently, not so much. I have not really achieved this very well this semester. I was doing this well last semester to keep me sane, but I think that I'm so overloaded this semester, I just can't do it without the guilt. I keep freezing up and/or getting lost in my "OMG, how the heck am I supposed to do all this and continue simple self-care practices like feed myself and clean" thoughts and then I lose track of time. I'm never done with what I need to do and I end up penalizing myself for the lost time by trying to force myself to do anything involving study or self-care instead. The closest I can get so far is my occasional hanging out with a friend who I know I can talk TCM with and get to know what I have already absorbed a little better. It's my strange way of doing "nothing", but still doing something. Not sure if that counts though..

7/13
I'm not entirely sure about this non-action, and I'm definitely not sure about this guilt-free thing. At this point, I'm struggling to stay not too far behind, so even the productive things I need to do like getting food and cleaning are starting to come with a smidgen of guilt, but at the very least, in the moment I'm somewhat guilt-free, the guilt usually comes when I'm looking at all studying I have to get done again and trying to figure out how I'm going to do it. I'll say that I have small successes in between studying when I need to just take a break, I'll eat a snack and watch a short video or go for a short walk. I have been going for walks with a friend most mornings guilt-free, but I don't know if it counts as non-action. It's a well-calculated "non-action" maybe, because I'm not exactly doing nothing. I am letting myself enjoy a break while crossing multiple things off my to-do list (socializing, exercise, breakfast, and Chinese medicine talk). Does that count as non-action? I don't know...